[plug] LINUX EXPOSED AS COMMUNIST PLOT!

[Rick (VK6EP)]

(You may think this is worth a laugh?)

Subject: 
             LINUX EXPOSED AS COMMUNIST PLOT! Details here . . .
        Date: 
             Fri, 02 Apr 1999 03:05:11 GMT
       From: 
             madnomad at cybrtyme (Mad Nomad)
 Newsgroups: 
             aus.computers.linux




The truth can now be told.  During the 1980's, a covert project
occupied the minds of high-level KGB and Politburo officials in the
former USSR (that's "CCCP" to those of you who watched those old
propaganda films.)  The space program, economic reforms, and
Afghanistan invasion were mere stunts to divert the world's attention
from the Soviets' true goal -- the creation of the ultimate PC
operating system.  The  Communists touted America's efforts with GEM
and OS/2 as evidence of capitalist corruption.  But one American
achievement proved a constant embarrassment to the Commies:  The
success of Microsoft's Paul Allen who, along with his junior
cofounder, developed Windows 1.0, and then Windows 2.0, and then
Windows 286, and then Windows 386, and then Windows 3.0, and then
Windows 3.1, and then Windows 3.11, and then Windows for Workgroups,
and then -- well, you get the picture.

The Communist old guard, however, seeded their program with undue
complexity when they condemned the use of the desktop metaphor as
decadent and bourgeois.  They insisted instead on the use of certain
carpentry and farm implements as the metaphor of the "OS of the
Revolution."  As the Kremlin poured more and more money into the
operating system race, Soviet society began to feel the strain.
Unable to keep pace with the fervent rate of capitalist upgrades, the
USSR collapsed and disbanded.  Finally, in 1991, the Communist Party
itself lost power over its last hangout, Russia.  The Collective
Bureau In Charge Of Revolutionary Operating System Victory, formerly
known as the CBICOROSV, persisted.  They changed their name to the
Grand New Usurpers, or GNU, and went underground.

An unrelenting investigation into this cabal has revealed their
location and terrible purpose.  From a short list of nations which had
somewhat tolerated the USSR, they chose an inconspicuous country,
Finland, apparently after an all-night session of drinking Finlandia
vodka and listening to Sibelius' "Finlandia" on a scratchy old
phonograph.  Headquartered out of sight, they finalized their plans
for revolution.  With preparations complete, later in 1991, shortly
after the GNU had disappeared from view, a young Finnish collaborator
smuggled the ten-year effort of the group to the masses via the
internet.  That student subversive used the unlikely alias "Linus
Torvalds," but we have learned that his real name is "Linus Torvalds."
To his comrades on the internet, however, he is known simply as "Linus
Torvalds."  We won't say he's BORING, but . . .

This operating system, called "Linux" by the group's misguided
propagandists (after a popular brand of Finnish vacuum cleaner,)
proved as cool and unperturbable as the nature of its adopted country.
The symbol for its GUI, X-Windows, is, after all, simply the Finnish
flag rotated 45 degrees.  The GNU's adoption of the penguin as a
trademark, however, betrays their true depravity.  The penguin, a
ferocious flightless bird of the Antarctic, is considered an extremely
dangerous predator by all ornithologists.

After its release, the GNU quickly seized the moment, distributing
Linux to its many cells around the world, until now its partisans
number in the hundreds of millions (well, OK, our espionage may be a
little shaky here.)  These fanatics, armed with the digital equivalent
of Mikhail Kalishnikov's Model 47, have pushed their revolution from
the alleys and gutters to the very doors of capitalism.  Supported by
the people, they are now on the march northwest.  Reports from
Seattle, that city of the Lotus-eaters, state that gunfire can be
heard just outside the city limits.  It's time for the American public
to WAKE UP.

On this great national holiday, do YOUR part for God, Country, the
American Flag, and Windows NT 3.5 and Windows NT 3.51 and Windows NT
4.0 and Windows 95 and Windows 98 and -- well, you get the picture.
Send me lots and lots of money so I can get this VITAL message out to
an unsuspecting public.  It's the American way!  No checks, please.

Mad Nomad (madnomad at cybrtyme.com)
April 1, 1999





Cheers
Rick

E=Mail    - rickd at iinet.net.au
Home Page - http://opera.iinet.net.au/~rickd/index.html