[plug] [OT] Dead pets

[Adam Davin]

Hello All,

Well after about 30 odd hours, I finally have power back...

On Mon, 16 May 2005 22:43:33 +0800
Gavin Chester <gavinchester1 at hotmail.com> wrote:

> On Mon, 2005-05-16 at 14:05 +0000, simon wrote:
> > Hey all, soz for the completely OT question but....
> > 
> > The problem: 3.5 year old daughter, dead budgie...... too young to
> > teach about death?
> > 
> > If so, whats a good excuse for his sudden disappearance? :)
> > 
> > Thanks
> > 
> > --
> > =================
> > Simon Scott
> > simon at plumtek.com
> > mob: 0409113359
> > =================
> 
> At the risk of sounding superior:
> 
> Whoa!  Do the other posters to this thread actually HAVE kids???  I
> realise that most/all were tongue in cheek, but come on!
> 
> I've had four kids myself (I know - bad for the planet, but I didn't
> set out to have that many. Long story).  Kids are more resilient than
> people seem to give them credit for and parents have crapped on to
> them for too many generations out of fear of hurting the fairytale
> view of the world. Many would say that this makes them weaker in the
> long run.  
> 
Well I have 3 kids here, and I agree that they are very resilient. As
for the fairytale thing, have you actually had a look at some of the
fairy tales lately. No, not the "modern" versions where the wolf locks
grandma in the broom cupboard, the version where the wolf eats both red
riding hood and her grandmother, and then the hunter comes along and
hacks the wolf open to let both grandma and RRH out. Or the one about
hansel and gretel where they are led into the woods by their stepmother
to die and then get caught by an old witch who tried to fatten hansel
for eating and sets gretel to work as a slave until the point where
gretel pushes her into a roasting hot oven... mmm fairy tales.. nice..
;)

> Okay, I'll climb down off my high-horse now ;-)
> 
> Take it as an ideal opportunity to explain about death & birth.  Make
> a _proper_ ceremony out of burying the bird in a special spot in the
> garden and put a memorial there for the kid to remember.  Sure, the
> disappearing bird/dog/cat trick is easy in the short term but the kid
> needs educating.  I worked out as a teenager that my parents had
> hoodwinked me about pets when I was a littly and I resented them for
> it at the time.  
> 
> Three and a half is not too young for all this.
> 
> Most important of all by doing it this way, when Granny (or whoever)
> dies your child will be emotionally prepared to grieve healthily. 
> 
I agree, explaining to the kids will be better in the long run,
especially if for some reason it comes out later on that there was a
switch, they might resent having been "tricked".

Another 2c worth ;)

Regards, 

-- 

Adam Davin
Byteme IT Services
Mob: 0422 893 898
Email: byteme-its at westnet.com.au